Depression can affect a person’s entire life. If your partner has been dealing with depression, you’re probably wondering how best to support them. You might also be feeling disconnected from them, since their depressive symptoms have likely caused them to withdraw even from you.
When you make a real effort to be there for your partner, you can be an important part of their recovery. Ultimately, it can even bring you closer together.
Learn about depression
Get started by educating yourself. Once you learn the symptoms of depression and how it progresses, you can adapt your behavior to meet your partner where they are. This might mean encouraging them to get outside, helping them eat a more balanced diet, and trying new things together.
Reading up on treatment options for depression can also prepare you for possible medication side effects and what you can both expect from therapy.
Be patient and empathetic
One of the best things you can do to support your partner is to try to understand them. They’re going through a rough state of mind. When they’re feeling particularly down, put yourself in their shoes. Try to avoid taking their symptoms personally—in all likelihood, they’re trying their best.
It’s also important to understand they’ll have good days and bad days. Depression isn’t cured overnight. Sometimes, it’s a long difficult process, especially if they struggle with certain types of medication or therapy. It’s most important to avoid pressuring them or expecting them to just be better instantly.
Create a safe listening space
Your partner should feel comfortable coming to you. When they talk about their feelings, pay attention. Make a serious effort to avoid judging them.
If you’ve never struggled with mental health issues, some of their perspectives might seem strange to you. Ask questions. Encourage them to let you into their inner world. You’re there to be a listening ear and a comforting shoulder.
Avoid minimizing their experience
It’s easy for someone who isn’t depressed to feel like someone should just “get over it.” Depression can be incredibly debilitating. It’s not something a person can control.
Instead, work to validate their experiences. Try telling them you understand why they might be feeling this way.
Encourage their self-care
When someone has depression, it’s easy to sink into isolation. They may struggle to get out of bed, withdraw from their friends, and turn to maladaptive coping mechanisms like alcohol, unhealthy foods, or playing video games excessively.
If this sounds like your partner, encourage them to step outside these cyclical behaviors. Getting outside into the sunshine can do wonders for depressive symptoms. So does reconnecting with friends and family. When you’re there to encourage them, they’re more likely to get enthusiastic about these activities.
Help with basic tasks
Depression can make even simple tasks like showering and brushing your teeth feel too difficult. Offer to help your partner with chores you can shoulder for the moment.
Things like preparing meals, tidying up, or getting their favorite foods while you’re out can make a difference. Think of this as small acts of kindness that show your love during this tough time.
Is your partner struggling with depression?
If you suspect your partner has depression, talk to them. Though it might be a tough conversation, encourage them to seek help. Depression is a medical condition that often needs treatment from medical doctors and therapists.
In therapy, they can work to change the negative thought patterns that fuel depression. They’ll also learn healthy coping mechanisms and how to treat depression by changing their behavior. If you’ve been having a hard time taking care of your partner lately—feeling burnt out, resentful, or frustrated—you might also benefit from therapy. You’ll learn how to take time to recharge, set healthy boundaries, and improve your relationship.
To find out more about how therapy can help your partner with depression, please reach out to us.